Wednesday, February 17, 2010

25 Reasons to Read/Not Read This Blog

25 things I haven't mentioned
That I think may be important
Or not
Maybe just 25 blips
That's it
25 random pieces of my life
That I will not be putting together for you
Because you know what?
I hate puzzles.

1. I don't have the patience for puzzles.
2. I can't listen recordings of my own voice; I think it sounds absolutely awful. Sometimes, when I'm speaking to someone, I'll recall how I sound, and I'll just stop talking.
3. I've been saying "shit" a lot lately. Mostly when I'm playing ping pong, and mostly when my shots don't hit the table. Still, swearing is a bad habit that I don't want to get into.
4. I've always wanted to learn the piano, but never could since we don't have one. For some reason, I've always thought I would be good at the piano if I could only learn.
5. My dreams usually have water in them (and no, it's not because I don't go to the bathroom before bed).
6. Han Solo is my favorite Star Wars character.
7. You know how biting into a Popsicle makes some people shudder? Well for me it's biting into a cotton ball.
8. If I didn't want to write for a living, I'd be a film director.
9. I tend to laugh at inappropriate times.
10. Besides this blog, I have a thought book that I write in every single day.
11. Sweaters are my favorite article of clothing
12. I can't draw very well, and I can't sing very well. Both talents I would like to possess.
13. I wish I knew more about politics.
14. Whenever I finish a really good book, I always turn to the author bio in the back and thank him/her aloud for writing such a wonderful story.
15. I adore crossword puzzles.
16. My toes crack all of the time.
17. I read out of six different books every night before I go to sleep: History for Every Day, God's Devotional Book, Letters and Devotions from Pope John Paul II, The Bible, Kings and Queens of England, and the current novel I'm reading.
18. I have never seen an Indiana Jones or James Bond movie. I should perhaps think about remedying this...
19. Every week I make a "to do" list for myself, and every month I print out a calendar and write out my entire schedule. I'm not exactly an anal organizer, but I do like to keep track of my life.
20. I would like either 'Blackbird' or 'In My Life' played at my funeral. The Beatles versions, of course.
21. Coke is my pop of choice (yes, I say pop. Welcome to the Midwest, folks).
22. I'm not a huge fan of perfectly sunny days. Overcast, a little windy, and 50 degrees is perfect for me.
23. My dream car is a 1961 turquoise Chevy Impala.
24. I love public speaking, even though I suppose I don't strike people as a very assertive person.
25. I would love to live in an old house when I'm grown up.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Back to Prose

Okay, enough poetry already. I love it, and you know that you (deep down) love it, but this is my blog, and therefore most of the posts should probably be written by me (although the Martian/Man poem was a Holly original).

Actually, that's really all I have to say as of now. No more poetry (at least for awhile). Now that said announcement has been made, I do not feel obliged to continue rambling.

Over and out.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Valentine's Day

I thought that it would be appropriate to post a love poem in honor of the occasion. John Keats wrote this for Franny Brawne.

Bright Star
Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art —
Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night
And watching, with eternal lids apart,
Like Nature's patient, sleepless Eremite,
The moving waters at their priestlike task
Of pure ablution round earth's human shores,
Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask
Of snow upon the mountains and the moors —
No — yet still stedfast, still unchangeable,
Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast,
To feel for ever its soft fall and swell,
Awake for ever in a sweet unrest,
Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath,
And so live ever — or else swoon to death.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

King is not a Martian, and I am not a Man.

King, teeth shining, props black-slippered feet up
The table bows as Evan leans back.
I listen to them talk,
Head in arms.
It's four a.m., and Evan's chin is pointed upwards,
He looks at me expectantly.
I grin against the blurriness of the darkness and the sand in my eyes.
It's four a.m. in the pool room.
We envelope the table with feet, back, and arms.
The radiator hums.

Monday, February 8, 2010

"The Time Has Come," (The Walrus Said)

"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--
Of cabbages--and kings--
And why the sea is boiling hot--
And whether pigs have wings."

I don't know about talking, but I feel like I have many things to write about this fine morning. Last night was certainly a night of revelations, some of which I will now reveal to you.

Before I begin, however, I would like to briefly ponder why last night was so thought-provoking. One reason could be that late at night something happens to me. I don't know how or why, I just know that night makes me alive, makes me think and dream about things that don't cross my mind during the day. Another reason could be simply that I'm 19, I'm foolish, and my high revelations seem to me the most important things in the world. Call me selfish, but if I may, I think that I can still use adolescence as an excuse for being nonsensical.

So here are the vaunted revelations, in no particular order. I do hope that you're not too disappointed in them, or that they at least remind you of your own thoughts.

1. I meddle way too much in other people's business; I get myself involved in situations that have nothing to do with me, and sometimes I even make things worse by fiddling with them. I think that I meddle because when a problem arises, even if I'm only on the outskirts, I have the hapless talent of being able to see the solution; of visualizing how things can be worked out, and exactly what I can do to enact that resolution. Unfortunately, most of the time things don't turn out the way I think they should, mainly because people are not chess pieces that I can move about a board and bend to my will. This of course frustrates me immensely. As someone once told me, I'm more concerned with getting what I want than most people are. I suppose that this kind of persistence can either be a fault or a virtue, but lately it's been purely a fault that needs to be corrected immediately.

2. Relationships are complicated. They really, really are, and it's incredibly difficult to discern what other people are thinking and feeling. Sometimes it's even difficult to get them to tell you what they're thinking and feeling. Often the best thing to do is to know yourself as well as you possibly can and to not make assumptions about anyone else.

3. I do not believe in apathy. I don't think that it's possible to be indifferent to anything. It's possible to see both sides of a situation, but it's not possible to not have an opinion one way or another. There's always some sort of inclination.

There you go. Surprisingly (maybe?) there was a lot more last night, but important things seem to fade as the sun gets higher in the sky. At least for me they do...

The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done--
"It's very rude of him," she said,
"To come and spoil the fun!"

Thursday, February 4, 2010

It's Pessimism Day

Pessimism is not something that I appreciate in the slightest. I find it to be an annoying quality, and I usually do not like to be around people who possess it. Don't get me wrong; even as an optimist I recognize that life is not wonderful and lovely in every way all the time. I simply prefer to find the good in situations and suppress the bad as best I can until I absolutely have to face it.

Today, however, is Pessimism Day. Don't check your calendars; I just made this one up, folks. But I feel like I need this venting, whether because I just haven't felt like myself lately and need to throw out an anchor of some sort, or because my day has been largely disappointing. We'll see, I guess.

Pessimismisms:
1. I had to wake up at 7:00 this morning, which gave me about 4 and 1/2 hours of sleep.
2. I didn't speak up in British Literature once, possibly because of the aforementioned exhaustion.
3. I have to revise the paper that I'm entering in an essay contest by February 15th, which is really soon considering how busy my life is right now.
4. Two different Pine boys asked two different Pine girls out today. Call me petty, but I didn't want either of these couples to develop for various reasons, and I don't think that they'll last very long. They're just two more Jenga blocks on the Pine Tower of Drama.
5. I said something really stupid in my Crusades class this afternoon. I don't know what's wrong with me! I'm just having a lot of trouble asserting my opinions in that class, and when I do they're completely weak and desperate (we get points for participation). I'm not sure if I'm intimidated by how big the class is, or how vocal everyone is, but the situation is just getting ridiculous. I know that I'm intelligent enough to be an asset to that class. I just need the courage put forth something original, and the sanity to think of better answers faster.
6. I didn't have time for lunch today, hence my stomach growled through all of my classes.
7. I really need to apply for a job here, but I don't have the time. It's only 2 hours a day 5 days a week, but I honestly can't spare that. Between studying and classes and activities I'm pretty much booked all day.
8. I'm tired of this. I feel like a whiny child, and furthermore, my life is not all bad by any means. Furthermore furthermore, this list is depressing me.

If you're thinking that this was some sort of moral-induced post, and that I planned to change my mind at the end and to go back to optimism, you're wrong. This post has just put things in perspective for me.
Here's your moral anyway: If you sit back and look at any situation long enough, you can find plenty of bad. However, if you make the bad the focus of your life, you'll only make yourself miserable and miss out on all the good (I got an A on my Communications, Media, and Rhetoric paper).

Stay gold, Ponyboy.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A Mellow Post For a Mellow Day

It's been an extremely low key day, despite some confusion on my part (though that's certainly nothing new).
Classes were so-so, breaks between classes were 20 minutes of gathering books and trying to finish reading Pride and Prejudice, and conversations with friends were limited to texts (see only 20 minutes between classes).
Now I'm sitting in the Student Center tabling for Support the U Day. Tabling is exactly what it sounds like; you sit at a table decked out with bright posters and candy incentives and hassle passers-by until they either sign up for your event or run away. The latter seems to be popular today.

As for the confusion, hopefully that's over now. For some reason early February is really busy for me, and I've been trying to sort out my schedule all day. Here's what today and tomorrow are looking like so far:

Today (Tuesday)
8:00-1:40 Class
2:30-4:30 Tabling (current activity)
4:30-5:00 Jeopardy (I know, I know, but it's Jeopardy!)
5:00-5:30 Dinner at Food Service
5:30-6:30 Intramural Volleyball practice at the RFC
7:00-9:00 Homework time (if all goes well)
9:17-10:00 Community Council Meeting
10:00-12:00 More homework time!
12:00-12:30 Shower, get ready for bed
1:00 Go to sleep (goodness knows I need it)

Wednesday
10:30 Wake up, get dressed
11:35-12:00 Eat lunch
12:00-2:00 Do homework, finish article for U.R.
2:00-3:20 Class
3:30-4:30 Meeting with Prof. about the Essay Contest
4:30-5:00 Jeopardy!
6:00-7:00 Pizza party for Support the U Day
7:00-8:00 College Bowl meeting
8:00-9:00 RFC with Maddie, Ben, Tim, and Chris?
9:00-12:00 Shower/homework
12:00 Bed (gosh I hope so)

So there it is. Just two days, and as you may have noticed, they both are absolutely crammed packed. As you may have also noticed, there is hardly any time for homework, and there is absolutely zero free time (not counting Jeopardy). Why is this, you may ask? Because in college, or at least at UMM, free time is homework time. I don't think I've ever once sat down and thought, "There's absolutely no studying I can be doing right now." Now this doesn't mean that whenever I have a few free minutes I do homework (far from it), it just means that it's always hovering over my head (which is rather disconcerting, to say the least).

Okay, I should post this into the void and sign off now.
Please know that despite my schedule I'm still having the time of my life here on the frozen tundra of UMM. Cheers!