A Speech

Here's a speech I gave in my Trial of Galileo class last week. I suppose if you're not in the class, you probably won't know what I'm talking about, but I'm proud of this speech.

Is there a career out there that would allow me to write and deliver passionate speeches all day? That doesn't involve going to law school, spending millions of dollars on campaigns, and wearing ugly pant suits? Didn't think so.


Appeal to His Holiness, Pope Urban VIII
No one thinks more highly than I do of the faithfulness, as well as the abilities, of the worthy gentlemen sitting in this very room. Considering my great respect for them, I shall speak forth my sentiments freely and without reserve. This is no time for ceremony. Should I keep back my opinions, through fear of giving offense, I should consider it an act of disloyalty toward the Majesty of Heaven, which I revere above all earthly kings.
I have listened for these past few weeks to you gentlemen go back and forth about issues of science, of church law, and of biblical interpretation. And while it is all very interesting, I couldn’t help gazing up at your gilded ceiling. If you look very carefully, you can see that there is real gold inlaid in the dome.
Tell me, how many soldiers could just a small bit of that gold feed? How many war horses could be shoed, how many blankets could be purchased, how many mugs of ale could give courage to how many hearts with the wealth of your ceiling? I have heard that the taxes of the people here in Rome are spent on building projects. Is your ceiling one such building project? It’s beautiful.
Your Holiness, forgive me, but above all else, allow me to be blunt. In Spain, they do not bow to your likeness, and murmur, “Your Holiness,” as the Italians do. In Spain, rather, you are known as the pope who has refused to lead his own Church in the great cause of our lifetime. You are the pope who has claimed poverty, but who still somehow manages to afford gold encrusted ceilings. You are the pope who has neglected to declare this war a Holy War, therefore condemning many of those who fight faithfully on the Catholic side to Hell. In Spain, they see your refusals, and your claims, and your neglect as evidence of possible Protestant sympathy.
In Spain, Your Holiness, they call you the Protestant Pope.
They have reason to be bitter, just as you, gentlemen, have reason to be afraid, for as we sit in these hallowed halls debating petty issues, thousands of faithful Catholics are being butchered. Catholic cities are being pillaged and burned. Formerly Catholic lands in Poland, Germany, Bohemia, and Livonia are now controlled by the Protestants. Even now armies gather north of the Alps. If the Protestant side should defeat the Catholic forces, they will have almost undisputed access to Italy. No one in this room need wonder which city they will set their eye on first. There is a chance that soon this ceiling will be blackened by fires set to Rome. The gold, of course, will be removed and used to fund the enemy’s cause. I am quite certain that it will feed a great many Protestant soldiers.
Squabbles over who will cast ballots for which faction will surely become obsolete when there is no Vatican left, no Rome, and no Church. Whether or not the Earth is spinning cannot possibly matter when compared to the Protestant threat marching upon it.
Your Holiness, I implore you; give us a leader all true Catholics can unite under, and prove to the world that the strength of the pope’s leadership is enough to quench even the fiercest enemies. Join Spain on the field of battle and rightfully declare this war a holy one. Tear down your gilded ceiling, for truly, gilded ceilings are for times of piece.
I wish to conclude, as is only proper, with a Bible quote, in hopes that we never forget who’s cause we are fighting for, and what we are fighting against: “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand” (Ephesians 6:10-13).